Grandma Shultz

Grandma Shultz passed away in her bed Monday afternoon. I spoke with her last on Saturday. She was hard to understand but she knew who I was and told me she loved me and missed me. I will cherish that last phone call for the rest of my life. Her funeral will be on saturday, she is being cremated. A celebration of her life is being held at her house from 3-6 that day. Even though we all knew it was coming and hospice kept telling us it would be anytime soon I still can't believe she's gone. When I read the text from my Aunt.
"Mama just passed", those words hit you like a ton of bricks, you can't breathe - your eyes swell up instantly with tears and you let out a cry that can't be controlled even if you were to try with every ounce of your being. Then it hits your head - she will never wrap her arms around you again. You will never hear her call you Peanut anymore. The one nickname that stuck through out your life and she was the only one that was allowed to call you that. The fear of picking up the phone to call her and tell her how frieghtened you really are knowing no one is there to answer. All of this happens in the first few seconds you read those words "Mama just passed"